Dying Twice

Dear Alzheimer’s Disease,

Here’s the thing I hate about you: You kill twice. First the mind, then the body. You are meaner than a crocodile. Actually, I don’t think crocodiles are that mean. They kill when they are hungry. You just eat away at random memories until they are gone, and the shell of a human is left. And when we  thought our grief was at its height, then you take the body too.

Last night I dreamt that I was at my stepfather Bill Darrow’s bedside as he was dying of cancer (which he did about three years ago). In the dream, I kept saying to myself “this is so strange because I did this already.” How could Bill die twice?

When I woke up, I realized that’s what is happening to Beau. We will lose him twice.

By the way, Mr. Alzheimer’s Disease, this is a picture of a rare albinio alligator. He’s kind of like a Bercaw: pale and scared, but able to fight back with big grin.

Love,

Nancy

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